Wishing for a second daughter…and it coming true
I actually wrote this piece months ago…but am just getting around to publishing it now. I wanted it on my blog, so I’m including it…because it was part of the journey:)
Ever since Hartley was about 3 months old, I’ve been visualizing another girl. Actually, both my husband and I wanted another girl. Not to say, that we don’t want a boy eventually. Boys love and cater to their mommas, and I really want to raise a good man and a future good husband for someone. Plus, there’s a little bit in all of us, that secretly hopes for our same gender, and I would love for my hubby to have a son.
With both our children, we opted to take an extra blood test, that tests the chromosomes, letting us know week 12 vs week 20, the sex of our child. In almost all aspects of my life, patience is not a virtue I possess…except when it comes to my children. I actually surprise myself with how much patience I have! Regardless, I can’t even fathom the idea of waiting till week 20, or not finding out at all!! Those are Absolutely NOT options...that week, between taking the test and finding out, is torturous enough!
Even before we conceived, I kept thinking our next baby was going to be a girl. We even picked out her name, over a year ago, when Hartley was 3 months old (meaning August of 2015…ha!), which is the only thing we’ve ever done in advance. The night we took the test, I started obsessing about the gender. First, I obsessed about getting pregnant, then making it that 1st week, then about baby making it to week 8, then week 12! Those first 12 weeks you are Terrified, yet trying to suppress your fears, and remain hopeful and positive at the same time. Especially, if you’ve suffered a miscarriage before, you spend the first 12 weeks doing a lot of praying and positive visualizations for a healthy baby. We really wanted this baby…and wanted he/she to make it, and be healthy…gender really didn’t matter, but I had had this hunch for so long. Regardless, I suffer major insomnia while pregnant, so that night, I started taking every Chinese lunar test on the internet, just to see if I could figure it out before the next week…see…serious lack of patience. Wouldn’t you guess…every test was saying boy...boy? I wasn’t even thinking boy…ha! Every test that suggested girl…when I ran that same test for Hartley, it predicted boy, so those weren’t valid. A boy…hmmm…
Those next few days, my phone was literally attached to me. Not only were we finding out the gender, which was a bonus, but we had run the first round of tests, and were waiting to hear first and foremost, about the health of our baby! Such a scary week…it seemed like it was so hard to just get pregnant, we desperately wanted this baby to make it, and to put our minds at ease that he/she was healthy.
Throughout all my life, I will never forget that phone call, for both my children, when the nurse told me the test results came back healthy!!! I will forever remember cheering and hysterically crying to the woman on the other end, and proceeding to tell each of them my whole conceiving story, and how badly we wanted to have this baby to love…why I don’t know. Those two phone calls were the best two phone calls of my life!!
And Bonus…We are having a girl…YES!! We desperately wanted another girl…I’m a good girl momma, my whole family has girls…I get girls. Also, having lost my own momma at age 7, I missed out on a lot of things with her, and have been waiting my whole life to have a daughter(s). I always wanted to raise a bunch of strong, independent, compassionate, kind, successful, intelligent, well rounded, talented, entrepreneurial, individualistic, animal and people loving, go getter, change/rule the world women. More importantly, the chance for Hartley to have an instant best friend, a dance/cheer buddy, a business partner, someone to travel to college with, and rush the same sorority, be each other’s maid/matron of honor, basically someone to share in all of life’s joys, and an instant support system for the lows. Ok so yes…I might be a little wacky with all these instant visuals…but so it is…My Girls…(Ahhhh…I love the sound of that)! I seriously can’t wait to experience everything in life with them! I have so much to show and teach them, and to educate them about this beautiful journey and gift of life!
I surprised my hubby by going to the party store and buying every pink candy they made (we both love candy), and arranging it in this mini floral cluster…it was the best I could come up with at that moment…ha! He was super excited and teary eyed to find out it was a girl. He loves being a daddy to a daughter so much, that he was looking forward to doing it all again…and he has no idea how amazing the future is truly going to be. He has no idea how these two little girls will grow up to worship and adore him, hang on his every word, and shower him with love, hugs and kisses, and giggles…oh it’s only the beginning my love…I’m so excited for you!
One of the main reasons I was so relieved to find out our second baby was a little girl, is Hope. I would love to have 4-5 children. With me being 39, at the time I deliver my 2nd, I’m not so sure that’s in the cards for us, but we definitely wanted more than 2! If my second was a boy, I could already hear people saying…be happy…you have one of each. I felt like God would be saying, ok you are done. Since, baby #2 is a girl, I feel there is a renewed hope now…that yes, we can potentially have a third...whether that baby is a boy or another girl…there is a now a glimmer of hope for that precious #3!! God is good…
However, come what may, I’m eternally grateful for the blessing of two daughters! Should this be it for us…it will be okay. I’m so grateful for two healthy, baby girls and the opportunity to have carried them both. What I mean from the above, is that it’s more of a silencing of the masses…I get to avoid the well you have one of both, just be happy…routine comment.
Below is how we announced to our family and friends that baby #2 is a girl…Hartley missed her second nap that day, and was starting to get a cold, and was legit crazy (little did we know then…this would be how all future photos would go...ha). Of course, we had a random windy day, and it took us about 20 min before we thought to tie the balloons together to keep them from blowing around…(hello!!...tip people). It was also our first time using a tripod, and I didn’t tighten it perfectly…oh man. As well, how did I ever think a one-year-old was going to smile at a tripod, sitting by itself, in the middle of our driveway…ha…so many lessons learned…I was totally green to all of this. Looking back now…I think…soooo hilarious…but I remember sweating like crazy then…